Tools for guys to be guys – Safety razors

My grandfather had a safety razor. I was too young to know what it was for. But I knew it was a machine. That it worked. That it was sharp. Decades later, I have my own. I am glad I rediscovered this lost art(icle) of manliness.

Well, not totally lost. I did buy the safety razor at the grocery store.

But when I pick up something like that, however, I feel like the only other hands reaching up to that same shelf are 80-years old, their owners saw Ted Williams play baseball, had clotheslines and ice boxes, and could have worked at the mill with my grandad before it closed down.

On the other hand, maybe not. Maybe it’s a bunch of reg’lar dudes.

I was inspired in part because of fond childhood memories, of being the apple of a guy’s eye who’s day job at one time included being a US asset to the French underground and liberating Auschwitz (WWII stuff). What brought those memories back, however, was Brett McKay’s excellent book The Art of Manliness.

So back to the safety razor, the grocery store-sourced Van Der Hagan.

Out of the box, the first thing I felt—what I miss so much of in our information-age life, is that this is a tool. A machine. With parts. That do something; useful.

I don’t want to overthink it. It’s not a Model T or double bit axe. But still. It has heft. It’s purely purpose-built.

Wait…You know what it is…It’s built to NOT be thrown away. That’s it!

Whose self-talk in the checkout line is: ‘Man, I can’t wait to throw this $^&* thing away and replace it with the same soul-less piece of sh++ and then throw that away! Awesome.’

You know who says that? Nobody.

If you know me, you must be wondering why on god’s green earth I am writing about shaving. My beard doesn’t amount to much. But it’s still hair on my face and I need to mow the grass every day.

So why would you spend 20-bucks on a safety razor instead of using wildly over-designed, multi-blade, sneaker-esque, overmolded whatevers? Because once you get the hang of it—you have to glide a safety razor over your face at a low angle, like a block plane shaves wood—it is the closest, tightest, smoothest shave I’ve ever gotten.

One simple blade, blazin’ sharp (Van Der Hagen says it works even better with their shave soap and brush; I’m a shower shaver so I’m using Dove Men + Care shave cream from a tube), attached to one gloriously simple, gloriously historic—the screw, thank you Archimedes—machine.

Cue record scratch sound…One more thing: If you have hard water, mineral deposits left over after the water dries could freeze the safety razor’s inner workings. A bath in CLR might un-freeze them. What I do is open and close the razor every few days to make sure it’s still good to go.